Ever since I can remember, I have loved fashion. As a small child I was fascinated with pouf dresses, poodle skirts, and ruffled socks. I knew exactly what I liked and what I wanted. However, somewhere down the journey of "growing up", we all learn the ability to conform and pieces of our voice become faint. Lines of choice become blurred, and our so called 'opinions' are no longer our own.
There came a point in my life where I started to ask myself, what do I really like? What are my Style quirks, and fashion choices?
For years I had followed the trends, and chosen the "popular" choice because that was what I thought fashion was all about. I knew I looked good, because everyone told me so, but it felt fake. The clothes I wore, never felt like they were a part of me, but a covering of some sort. A bit like armor, it protected the person I was inside, but it did nothing to showcase who I really was.
When I started to think deeper about the issue, I realized the person we all call, "I, me, and myself", had been horribly neglected, and I wanted to get to know her.
Here are my 5 Tips on How I Found My Own Style.
Yes, I realize shopping with a good friend is a lot of fun, and a great moment to catch up on the latest gossip, but think of shopping by yourself, as a necessary time to practice some individual thinking.
I use to never shop a lone, and I can remember always asking the opinions of my friends and what they thought. How does it look? What do you think? This often leads to joint decisions on what you should and should not purchase.
However, knowing what you like and what you do not, without the opinions or approval of others, creates strength in maintaining your own voice. Your fashion choices should remain your own, and often times, other people do not have the ability to see your vision. Do not be afraid to make a mistake if the choice was your own.
2) Don't Be Afraid To Be Different.
Being unique, is a scary thing. You have no idea what other people will say or think and being the only one is a daunting position. However, like everything in life, you just have to practice, and you do get stronger. If you do not understand the latest craze in black witch hats, and prefer a pink bonnet, don't let fear or rejection stop you. Living your life lies in your ability to conquer your fears.
Our society loves to function on what I call, "brainless mode", and thinking has taken a back seat. Before you become a lazy copycat, challenge yourself to finding pieces of clothing that represent you in a way, that no body else could pull off. What makes you unique? What are your hobbies? What time period of clothes do you love?
For example, I love dainty lace and silk embroidery of 18th Century France. I also love interesting textiles, textures, and quirky antiques. I constantly rummage through old antique or vintage stores, and love changing up buttons on all my clothes.
4) Fashion Fool. Fooling others or just yourself?
The hardest part of Style is the moment you are still thinking like everyone else. Do you dress for acceptance from others, or seek a relationship with yourself? People will always have an opinion about you, and there is no denying the power of what you wear. Everyone can manipulate their image and pretend to be anyone they desire. Whether you want to look smarter, richer, dumber, or poorer, the choice is yours. However, accepting the person you really are, and dressing in a way that matches how you feel, eliminates the unnecessary confusion of living in a container that does not represent you.
5) Picking a Unique Style is Like Making a Smoothie.
Often times, people get stuck in labels of what they are. If you are goth you must always wear black, or if preppy you must wear a lot of polos and loafers. The great thing about style is learning how to mix your own unique fashion "smoothie". There are no rules. You can be whatever you want, and the point is to customize it to fit you like a glove.
For example maybe you love the METS, but are still a girly girl with edge, and love a bit of sparkle? Why not try distressed jeans, a sparkle stiletto, METS t-shirt, and a fitted leather jacket?